The True Meaning of Family
Of course we all know what family is, but there is a difference between blood-family and real family. Usually when someone says to you, “When is your family coming over?” you both know that they’re referring to the blood relatives. That isn’t what I am referring to though; I’m talking about the ones that are truly there for you, that care for you and take your side even through unfathomable odds of success.
Speaking from experience, family isn’t always what their title is cut out to be. Time and time again, I’ve suffered because of the relatives; they’ve brought me nothing but pain and sorrow. But I can’t complain; you know why? Because they’re right. True enough, over the years I’ve been given a few more beatings than I deserved, but they have the upper hand. There is no winning. Why is there no winning? Well, because for starters, they really DO own the house, and they DO put clothes on your back and a meal on the table. Maybe not always, but they do.
In all of their years of bad parenting, I still haven’t figured out the answer to this one question: “Why do they want me if they’re just going to neglect me?” I couldn’t count the number of times where they beat me and told me to get out of the house. They still keep me though, which is weird. Often, I’ve thought of the possibility that they actually do love me, but those contemplations were quickly diminished when they took my Christmas money and got wasted instead of buying my brother and me presents. Maybe they want me around as a workhorse? I am not sure; the only thing I am sure of is how many times I have called the police on my father for trying to beat us (I tallied it; it was 12).
As resentful of my parents as I am, I don’t jump to conclusions, ever. It’s one of my rules. Before I decided to declare all parents evil and try to banish them to a secluded island with no hope of escape, I did a bit of research and investigating. Secretly, through conversations, I interviewed young children, teens and adults of what they think about their parents and family (opinions do change); the results were just as I expected: about half of the subjects really HATE their parents, and the other half, as one said, “Sometimes they can be A-holes, but usually they are good parents.”
Now let me make my point, before this article becomes unbearably long: Your true family is not that of your blood, it is the one that truly cares for you. Your family might be your best friend, your girlfriend, or even your co-workers. It’s the people you feel most safe with; the ones that have the ability to create a warm and loving bubble around you.
My family is my friends. Although that may be a bit pathetic to say, they’re all I possess. Sure, my parents have done more for me than my friends have, but that’s because they have to, not because they want to (it’s the thought that counts.); because if they don’t, I’ll call Child Services on them. My real family, on the other hand, has done more for me than my blood-relatives ever could. Instead of feeling fearful and miserable, I feel optimistic and content.
Don’t think you’re stuck with one family forever, because you’re not. Sure, you might have the same DNA as them, but all humans have blood, and there are so many to choose from. Don’t let some chauvinistic, egoistic maniacs ruin your life; find someone that actually appreciates you, in form of love or friendship (or both). Don’t let them convince you that your world revolves around them. Create your own family, your own path, your own future.