Explanations to unidentified reasons as to why parents blame you, the child, for everything wrong in THEIR lives.
Throughout life, everyone has problems with their parents, from the most perfect family to the most shallowly disoriented. Often times, from the parents’ perspective, it’s safe to assume that your child is off doing things that he/she should not be doing, of course. Although that is the safest thing to assume, it isn’t fair and it isn’t right, because it’s not always true.
Every parent exerts respective authority to the best of his knowledge with hopes of being an adequate role model. It is safe to say that no one can be 100% at anything, no matter who they may be. Having said this, I’d like to proudly point out that parents are defective a whole lot more than they presume! A WHOLE LOT!
But before you jump at my throat for unjustly slandering your perfect parent, hear me out. No matter whom you are, you are bound to wrongfully expel some anger and rage toward those who do not deserve it. For example, if you are working immensely for the better part of your day, your “lovely” boss is yelling at you, and you’ve just learned that you’ll have to continue using the bus as transportation to work for another week because your car is getting a full tune-up from that accident that wasn’t your fault, then you are expected to have at least a tiny bit of anger bottled up inside. Anger that, for the most part, will be thrown at the wrong people.
As a person, I know that everyone has some steam they’d like to blow off once in a while. I understand. I understand you just fine, parents. But what I DON’T deduce from all this, nor choose to accept your judgment as a reasonable answer is, “Why do you discharge your fury on those you love most?” What I mean is, from all of the people you hate, and the hundreds of strangers you see every day, why’d you decide to make your loved ones most miserable? If family comes first, why do you put them last?
The reason is targets. Everyone, even you and I, have targets on who we take our anger out on. Usually, it’s somebody we come in contact with every day; a co-worker, a classmate, or in this case, a family member. Adults pick their children (or spouse) as targets because they are the most qualified candidates for the job. How could they not be!? From a parent’s point of view, you will never get in any serious trouble for yelling or punishing your child, you have complete control over them AND they get mad when you punish them. I’ll give you the basic breakdown: Parents wrongfully punish their children so they can feel better about their useless lives. They have nobody to boss around, so they control their children. Plain and simple. Making someone else feel bad makes you feel good! It’s human nature! Although the more stress you have, from work, school, pressured life, etc., the more you tend to save for later. Using your child as target practice for anger-release techniques grows and spreads in a person’s subconscious faster than wildfire. More anger means more hatred toward your children, which, in turn, means more relief and release for you.
Don’t get me wrong, I am no therapist. If you’re looking for a specific solution that involves “5 Easy Steps” to relinquish your anger in a positive way, you are sadly mistaken. I cannot, nor can anyone else, give you that formula. There is no specific recipe for fixing family relationships because every individual’s family is different. We are all different; that’s what constructs our unique components. So, for me to tell you how you should behave with and around your children would be to unwillingly alter yourself. Then this would all be pointless, wouldn’t it? Just like robots.
I have no specific answer, although here are my “5 Easy Steps” that apply to the general population:
- Do not mistreat the ones you love most, self-explanatory.
- Parents, don’t find false reasons to punish your children, find other ways of releasing anger.
- The children of parents (which is everybody), stand up to your “tyrants” and remind them that you’re not just some random piece of trash off the street, you are their child.
- When choosing a target, make sure it’s someone that you have reason to hate, or no reason to love.
- STOP LYING TO YOURSELF. STOP BLAMING OTHERS. TAKE SOME RESPONSIBILITY!
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Many times, whether it’s writer’s block or just blank thoughts, we can’t find any descent forms of inspiration. Simply, nothing comes to mind and you find yourself unable to put pen to paper, or digits to keyboard, or to click a simple button on a camera. Whatever your artistic interests may be, there are a few key places that a person can look. These places, when searched systematically, have endless pools of fresh ideas; an eternal stream of data, just waiting for someone to transform it into magic.
Family and Friends
When we are depressed, we often go to one (if not both) of the two sources and ask for help and advice. Well, inspiration can work the same way. They don’t have to be noted of it; just behave like you would generally, but examine yourself and the world around you more thoroughly and remember what or how you feel. Normally, you would think nothing of it, because family is SUPPOSED to make you feel safe and secure, and friends are SUPPOSED to make you feel excited and cheerful. In these harsh times though, where the cost of inspiration is skyrocketing through the roof, you can use everyday experiences and people, such as your family and friends, to give you the boost you desire.
Sun: the natural light bulb. Wind: the natural air conditioner. Earth: the natural home. Without knowing it, we have isolated ourselves from most of the outside world. It might not feel that way because we have the freedom to decide to stay in or go out, but needless to say, we choose the less intelligent one. Writers read much off of the internet and photographers look for photos on the internet for one MAIN reason: to hijack ideas and transform them into their own. A little thesaurus or Photoshop, and half an hour later you have a perfectly “creative and exclusive” piece of work. It’s not a crime to get thoughts from similar thoughts, but it might be better to start somewhere else first. Nature leads us to find amazing landscapes, marvelous creatures, and an infinite amount of inspiration. The trees, the sun, the moon, wildlife, etc. There are unfathomable amounts of dreams just waiting to become reality.
From good to bad, music is in a category all on its own. Without a doubt, music can bring us from the most unearthly hellish slums, to pure enjoyment and ecstasy. The moment you press play, you can feel enlightenment travel through those headphones, through the air. It tweaks your brain, making you take notice to things that seemed unreal or impossible before. It isn’t a scattered form of art, but more a language. It is a form of energy, and you are the converter. It builds up inside you, until you are full, then it seeps through, exiting your body in form of words or images. You are borrowing its power to make power of your own. It has the capability to make a person with a metal leg run a marathon; it can influence a town, city, state, country, or even the world! Its capabilities are limitless, all you have to do is put them together.
Site for photographers: http://www.alphacoders.com/
Positively inspirational artists: AC/DC, Aerosmith, Beatles, Bob Marley, Guns N’ Roses, Heartless Bastards, Joy Division, Interpol, Killers, Led Zeppelin, MGMT, Rolling Stones, Utada Hikaru, White Stripes, etc.
Physical, mental, family, and life health are important aspects in life. You cannot be healthy without being well in all four subject areas. This article takes a look into each section and see how you can be more healthy starting today.
Who doesn’t want to be physically fit?! This is a very important asset to have. So why is physical health so important? Well, for one, it lengthens life expectancy. Live longer! It might be hard to pick up at first, but it is important in the long end. Exercise also makes you feel fantastic. More confidence, and it makes you happy. It is proven to release endorphins that make you happy. So when you’re feeling glum, go exercise. Another very peculiar thing that it does is it lets you sleep better. Most people often complain about sleeping problems, and most of those people are lazy. Exercise regulates your internal clock, and it helps you sleep much better. And last but not least, let’s not forget, it makes you look more attractive! So if you are trying to impress that one special person, why not get in shape and do just that?!
Mental health is very important in everyday life for many reasons. Think clearly, think faster, perform tasks better, makes speech clearer, and it just, on average, makes you sound smarter. This is a type of chain; one sets off the other, and so on. Mentally helps you think of words or sentences faster, get your work or homework done A LOT quicker, and it gives you better word choice to make you sound like a pure genius! Reading, writing and mental games such as chess or checkers all help progress this process. These are all things to exercise your mind with.
Whether it’s just your parents or your wife and three children, it’s always good to have a good relationship with your family.Although people say they are cheerful alone, they are never as happy as they are with their family. It is key to true happiness. It is a new kind of love that must be experience. A life is wasted without family, for family is a main ingredient in the hodgepodge we call “living.” They support your decision and they back you 100% on anything, even if you’re wrong. And most importantly, they are always there to cheer you up when no one else is. Family helps you up at your weakest moment.
A well-maintained life is very important. Inside you is the spark of true happiness, and the world is your fuel. If you have a healthy life overall, there is nothing you can’t accomplish. You can control so much more than you think. YOU have the power to shape your future any way you want! All that is needed is confidence and willpower.
Exercise to live your life longer and feel better.
Train your mind to be more knowledgeable.
Support your family, because they’re always supporting you.
With all of this you can become everything you’ve ever dreamed of!
Something really hit close home today. I was at work, and I had found out that one of my fellow co-workers, his mom just died this morning from battling lung cancer. He is not much older than I am. He is 28, and I am only 25. I love my mom, and hell, my mom does a lot of things for me that I take for granted these days.
She helps prepares my taxes, and handles the finances, especially with handling the logistics of a new house I just recently got (that is a different story). After hearing the news, I sort of started thinking “Who do you take for granted these days?”
In my family, no one has died yet. Yes, I had a grandmother pass away, as well as an aunt, but I didn’t really know them. My aunt died from breast cancer, and my grandmother from stroke. This was a few years ago. The aunt is survived by her husband and three children. Last I heard, the father was doing OK but it took him a couple months for grieving.
Someday death will arrive at my family. Who will it be? My parents? My brother, sister, myself? You don’t know, and I don’t know. If my parents were gone, would I know enough to survive on my own? Once you think about it, the moment someone dies, it is a lot of work afterward to clean up their “mess”. You have to arrange a funeral and invite people. You may need to sell off the house, or pay off the deceased loans/bills. The hardest part of it all is continue to live life when that loved one is no longer with you.
I have not had the experience yet to lose someone close to me, but I fear that when that time comes, I will not be strong enough to carry on (for at least a while). Could you? If you had a loved one that was taken away from you, how does it feel? How did you cope, or even manage?
Death is a natural part of life, and in part, it is scary in it of itself. You are hear on this planet for X amount of time. After so many years, you got to kick the bucket. Then what? Yes, many people have a religion and they believe in Christ and that they will go to the afterlife of some sort.
I am Catholic, and I have faith that an afterlife does exist, such as heaven, with God. It sort of gives me an inner peace so I can carry on with my daily life. If I didn’t believe in such a realm, I think I would just stare at the wall all day and get sucked into this black hole of what is the purpose of life thing.
Worst case scenario: Imagine there is no afterlife, then what? Just go *poof* and that’s it? You ever hear stories about how fact is stranger than fiction? Such as the statue of Mary in Rome that has tears running down her eyes? Or the cop video that shows a criminal car driving through a fence without knocking it down?
What do you think? How do you get a grip on life with your own existence, knowing that someday you too will disappear forever? Scary, right? *shudders*
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I thought this week I would add a bit of a twist to the style of “life” article I bring. I found this very interesting myself and can now blame my problems on the ones who swear my issues come from external causes.
Quoted from Slashdot: “A December 6th article in Nature explores the relationship between a specific gene and those of us prone to repeatedly making the same mistakes. From the article: “Drug addicts, alcoholics and compulsive gamblers are known to be more likely than other people to have this genetic mutation …” The gene results in the development of fewer D2 receptors in the brain, a condition which the study has shown leads to a lessened ability to learn from experience.”
Your flaws are finally your family’s fault.
Everybody has to cut their hair right at some point or another right? Just so you know, I’m talking about the hair on your head. 😛
Ok, so if you go to the barber shop, depending on where it is and if you got any deals, hair cuts easily range from $7 up to $20. If the average haircut with taxes is a clean $15, and you cut your hair once a month, that is a grand total of $180 a year. Now if you have family members, and it costs more or less the same per person, and factor in driving to the barber shop and other misc items, cutting your family’s hair could easily go over $300 a year! This isn’t pocket change!
What can you do to alleviate the costs? Simple, buy a haircut kit, and learn how to cut each other’s hair if you have a family, or if you live by yourself, cut the hair yourself or get a friend to help you.
1) Hair cuttery kit. You can find these at stores like Wal-Mart, Target, Walgreens, any convenience store really.
2) A penny. On the electric razor, you may need to adjust the power of the blade. To do this, you need a penny or a flat head screw driver to adjust the power.
3) Hair cut tutorials: Find pictures of hair styles you like and try to cut it like that. Or stop by a local barber school, and see how they cut hair. Did you know if you go to a barber/cosmetology school, you can get your hair cut for low prices, or even for free? The only caveat is you may have to sit around longer as the students perfect their technique.
Google for hair cut tutorials and you shall find some. Here is one that has a link to a bunch of sites and tips for cutting hair. Source
4) A handheld mirror. This will prove to be of use when you cut someone else’s hair or your own hair as you can see what is happening in real time.
After some practice cutting each others hair, or your kids hair, you will turn that $10 haircut investment into a money saver. From time to time, don’t forget to clean out the hair and oil up the blade, and this will last you forever.
Tips for single male guys who want to save money on hair cuts
For single men, maybe you don’t want to go to the barber shop and waste your money. If you have a hair cut kit, this is what you can do.
1) If you shave your head, then thats the easiest thing to do. Put the razor on the smallest blade setting and have at it.
2) If you want to cut your hair in a particular style, I recommend going to a barber first. Afterwards, say every week or so, stand in front of the mirror and shave the sides of your head and whatever to keep it maintained. Remember, when hair is short it is easy to cut it and make it presentable. As hair gets longer, it will be easier to notice if you screw up cutting your own hair. 😛
3) As another tip, try getting a handheld mirror. When you stand in front of the bathroom mirror, use that to cut the hair you can see on the sides of your head and whatnot. To cut the hair on the back of your head and for trimming, this is where the handheld mirror is useful. You can hold the mirror in one hand, and look at that mirror to see the reflection of your head on the bigger mirror while the other hand cuts your hair. It takes awhile to get used to, but with patience, you can get a nice haircut done.
Practice makes perfect!